I remember when I first listened to it, it resonated to a deep level and felt as if I were spending time with another person, knowing what I was going through, how I actually felt, while at the same time, feeling hopeful, happy or as she sings, “We’re happy, free, confused and lonely at the same time!”
It gave me realisations, a vision of what to be and definitely what NOT to be, yet there’s always this yearning of what should’ve been but didn’t work out. I kept trying to mend but didn’t know that the second person was not worth it, of my vulnerability, my pathetic state, my everything I ever gave to anyone till date as they never respected it at all but this album RED helped me overcome it all, helped me accept my reality, little by little by little reminders and scenes playing in my head by the songs and also letting it all go with grace as it made me realise that I’m better than this even if it burns, hurts or makes me yearn and that I’m powerful, strong and that I deserve the best. We all do.
I have beautiful memories linked to this album; it uplifted and improved my writing time to time and I stopped being someone who needed anything from anyone or giving everyone which they didn’t even deserve in the first place and being so friendly about both these things to the people as if we were friends and started working and improving myself, trying to be a better me than be a person who was needy, delicate, who was a total people-pleaser, in a nutshell who was miserable, vulnerable and incomplete.
Time passed and I could never get over this album, which remained with me in all times- good and bad and still not able to- my Evergreen favorite as I call it. It also inspired me to buy my 1st RED guitar and learn to play it too as I was obsessed with Taylor’s outfits and her glittering guitar in her RED Tour! I also started buying RED colored clothes and jewellery for me, as her outfits and everything related to the album in the tour made me feel the stronger, fierce, powerful. The most proud moment and incident was when I covered and recorded my first ever song, “All Too Well” because its music composition resonates sadness, strong feeling, remembrance and strong tearful, passionate anger. And I performed that particular song as I was going through it all and needed someone or something to listen to my side of the story and understand it and match my level of passion.
Today, when I listened to the Taylor’s Version of RED, I smiled, I laughed that I even did silly things when I listened to these songs repeatedly back then, I wept too as the past remains hidden beneath layers and never vanishes but I am not the same person as I was before, but a different me, an improved me with a purpose.
an entity of CONTRADICTIONS. out now!